[Pixsurguy]

Jeez guys, all of this comes AFTER he gets sworn in. Then he’ll do everything you thought he would.

I thought Obama would teach everyone the difference between "its" and "it's."

I thought Obama would buy me an iPhone.

I thought Obama would save my job.

I thought Obama would get my mom off my case.

I thought Obama would bring my dog back.

I thought Obama would bring back "Arrested Development."

I thought Obama would take me to that cool bar he was always talking about.

I thought Obama would back me up on Journey's "Don't Stop Believin'".

I thought Obama was offering happy hour all night.

I thought Obama would put the baby to bed.

I thought Obama would lend me season 3 of "The Wire."

I thought Obama would make me smell like cookies.

I thought Obama would overhaul my wardrobe.

I thought Obama would make life fair.

I thought Obama would have cured diabetes by now.

I thought Obama would let me smoke inside.

I thought Obama was giving Christmas bonuses.

I thought Obama would restore my 401K.

I thought Obama would pimp my ride.

I thought Obama would nominate a Secretary of Cute Bunnies and Kitties.

I thought Obama would flatten my abs.

I thought Obama would pay for this round.

I thought Obama would give me straight A's.

I thought Obama would clear up my acne.

I thought Obama would get me laid.