Wife 1.0 Just Released

handymanmike92683 · 03-02-2005, 12:51 AM

Wife 1.0 Just Released

Dear Tech Support,

Last year I upgraded from Girlfriend 7.0 to Wife 1.0 and noticed that the new program began unexpected child processing that took up a lot of new space and valuable resources. No mention of this phenomenon was included in the product brochure.

In addition, Wife 1.0 installs itself into all other programs and launches during system initialization, where it monitors all other system activity. Applications such as Poker Night 10.3, Drunken Boys Night 2.5 and Saturday Football 5.0 no longer run, crashing the system whenever selected.

I cannot seem to keep wife 1.0 in the background while attempting to run some of my other favorite applications. I am thinking about going back to Girlfriend 7.0, but the uninstall does not work on this program.

Can you please help me !!!???

Thanks,
A TROUBLED USER

------------------------------------------------------------ Dear TROUBLED USER,

This is a very common problem men complain about, but is mostly due to a primary misconception. Many people upgrade from Girlfriend 7.0 to Wife 1.0 with the idea that Wife 1.0 is merely a UTILITIES & ENTERTAINMENT program. Wife 1.0 is an OPERATING SYSTEM and designed by it's creator to run everything.

It is unlikely you would be able to purge Wife 1.0 and still convert back to Girlfriend 7.0. Hidden operating files within your system would cause Girlfriend 7.0 to emulate Wife 1.0 so nothing is gained. It is impossible to uninstall, delete, or purge the program files from the system once installed. You cannot go back to Girlfriend 7.0 because Wife 1.0 is not designed to do this.

Some have tried to install Girlfriend 8.0 or Wife 2.0 but end up with more problems than the original system. Look in your manual under "Warnings- Alimony/Child support". I recommend you keep Wife 1.0 and deal with the situation.

I suggest installing background application program C:YES DEAR to alleviate software augmentation. Having installed Wife 1.0 myself, I might also suggest you read the entire section regarding General Partnership Faults (GPFs). You must assume all responsibility for faults and problems that might occur, regardless of their cause. The best course of action will be to enter the command C:APOLOGIZE. In any case avoid excessive use of C:YES DEAR because ultimately you may have to give the APOLOGIZE command before the operating system will return to normal. The system will run smoothly as long as you take the blame for all the GPFs.

Wife 1.0 is a great program, but very high-maintenance. Consider buying additional software to improve the performance of Wife 1.0. I recommend Flowers 3.1 and Diamonds 2K. Do not, under any circumstances install Secretary with Short Skirt 3.3. This is not a supported application for Wife 1.0 and is likely to cause irreversible damage to the operating system.

Best of Luck,
Tech Support

**IZaNaMI** · 03-02-2005, 10:33 AM

LoL let's face it ... you screwed

handymanmike92683 · 03-03-2005, 10:16 AM

EXACTLY !
THANX FOR THE REPLY IZZY

Quote:

Originally Posted by IZaNaMI

LoL let's face it ... you screwed

handymanmike92683 · 03-07-2005, 01:24 AM

After the Honeymoon...

A couple has returned from their honeymoon and it was obvious to everyone that they are not talking to each other. The groom's best man takes him aside and asks what's wrong.

"Well," replied the man "when we had finished making love on the first night, as I got up to go to the bathroom, I put a $50 bill on the pillow without thinking."

"Oh, you shouldn't worry about that too much," said his friend. "I'm sure your wife will get over it soon enough - she can't expect you to have been saving yourself all these years!"

The groom nodded gently and said, "I don't know if I can get over this though: She gave me $20 change!''

chelle7293 · 03-07-2005, 02:10 AM

The
National Highway
Safety Council has done extensive testing on a newly designed seat belt. Results show that accidents can be reduced by as much as 45% when the belt is properly installed. Correct installation is illustrated below:

handymanmike92683 · 03-07-2005, 09:59 AM

GREAT AD-ON CHELLE
AND OH SO TRUE
LOL
THANX SWEETIE

Quote:

Originally Posted by chelle7293

The
National Highway
Safety Council has done extensive testing on a newly designed seat belt. Results show that accidents can be reduced by as much as 45% when the belt is properly installed. Correct installation is illustrated below:

chelle7293 · 03-07-2005, 11:06 AM

your welcome doll

Quote:

Originally Posted by handymanmike92683

GREAT AD-ON CHELLE

AND OH SO TRUE
LOL
THANX SWEETIE

handymanmike92683 · 03-08-2005, 11:20 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by chelle7293

your welcome doll

doulfins11 · 03-09-2005, 09:04 AM

funny mike!

surfdaddy · 03-09-2005, 10:12 PM

lmao good post handy i think i need updates to wife 1.0

03-02-2005, 12:51 AM	#1 (permalink)
handymanmike92683 A Premium Jokaroo'er Join Date: Mar 2004 Location: O.C. CALIFORNIA Posts: 30,499 Rep Power: 1628	Wife 1.0 Just Released Wife 1.0 Just Released Dear Tech Support, Last year I upgraded from Girlfriend 7.0 to Wife 1.0 and noticed that the new program began unexpected child processing that took up a lot of new space and valuable resources. No mention of this phenomenon was included in the product brochure. In addition, Wife 1.0 installs itself into all other programs and launches during system initialization, where it monitors all other system activity. Applications such as Poker Night 10.3, Drunken Boys Night 2.5 and Saturday Football 5.0 no longer run, crashing the system whenever selected. I cannot seem to keep wife 1.0 in the background while attempting to run some of my other favorite applications. I am thinking about going back to Girlfriend 7.0, but the uninstall does not work on this program. Can you please help me !!!??? Thanks, A TROUBLED USER ------------------------------------------------------------ Dear TROUBLED USER, This is a very common problem men complain about, but is mostly due to a primary misconception. Many people upgrade from Girlfriend 7.0 to Wife 1.0 with the idea that Wife 1.0 is merely a UTILITIES & ENTERTAINMENT program. Wife 1.0 is an OPERATING SYSTEM and designed by it's creator to run everything. It is unlikely you would be able to purge Wife 1.0 and still convert back to Girlfriend 7.0. Hidden operating files within your system would cause Girlfriend 7.0 to emulate Wife 1.0 so nothing is gained. It is impossible to uninstall, delete, or purge the program files from the system once installed. You cannot go back to Girlfriend 7.0 because Wife 1.0 is not designed to do this. Some have tried to install Girlfriend 8.0 or Wife 2.0 but end up with more problems than the original system. Look in your manual under "Warnings- Alimony/Child support". I recommend you keep Wife 1.0 and deal with the situation. I suggest installing background application program C:YES DEAR to alleviate software augmentation. Having installed Wife 1.0 myself, I might also suggest you read the entire section regarding General Partnership Faults (GPFs). You must assume all responsibility for faults and problems that might occur, regardless of their cause. The best course of action will be to enter the command C:APOLOGIZE. In any case avoid excessive use of C:YES DEAR because ultimately you may have to give the APOLOGIZE command before the operating system will return to normal. The system will run smoothly as long as you take the blame for all the GPFs. Wife 1.0 is a great program, but very high-maintenance. Consider buying additional software to improve the performance of Wife 1.0. I recommend Flowers 3.1 and Diamonds 2K. Do not, under any circumstances install Secretary with Short Skirt 3.3. This is not a supported application for Wife 1.0 and is likely to cause irreversible damage to the operating system. Best of Luck, Tech Support __________________

03-07-2005, 01:24 AM	#4 (permalink)
handymanmike92683 A Premium Jokaroo'er Join Date: Mar 2004 Location: O.C. CALIFORNIA Posts: 30,499 Rep Power: 1628	After the Honeymoon... A couple has returned from their honeymoon and it was obvious to everyone that they are not talking to each other. The groom's best man takes him aside and asks what's wrong. "Well," replied the man "when we had finished making love on the first night, as I got up to go to the bathroom, I put a $50 bill on the pillow without thinking." "Oh, you shouldn't worry about that too much," said his friend. "I'm sure your wife will get over it soon enough - she can't expect you to have been saving yourself all these years!" The groom nodded gently and said, "I don't know if I can get over this though: She gave me $20 change!'' __________________

03-09-2005, 09:04 AM	#9 (permalink)
doulfins11 Senior Member Join Date: Dec 2003 Location: Senath, MO Posts: 6,820 Rep Power: 657	funny mike! __________________

03-09-2005, 10:12 PM	#10 (permalink)
surfdaddy Member Join Date: Nov 2004 Location: SOMEWHERE BY THE DEEP BLUE SEA Posts: 396 Rep Power: 33	lmao good post handy i think i need updates to wife 1.0 __________________

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03-02-2005, 10:33 AM	#2 (permalink)
IZaNaMI Moderator Join Date: Oct 2003 Location: puɐ1buǝ 'ǝɹıɥsʞɹoʎ Posts: 21,702 Rep Power: 1642	LoL let's face it ... you screwed