Go Back   Jokeroo Community > The Jokers Joint > Battle of Sexes

Reply
 
LinkBack Thread Tools
Old 05-20-2008, 05:03 PM   #1021 (permalink)
Super Moderator
 
squirt's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2004
Location: Dallas, TX
Posts: 355,858
Rep Power: 8572
squirt has a reputation beyond reputesquirt has a reputation beyond reputesquirt has a reputation beyond reputesquirt has a reputation beyond reputesquirt has a reputation beyond reputesquirt has a reputation beyond reputesquirt has a reputation beyond reputesquirt has a reputation beyond reputesquirt has a reputation beyond reputesquirt has a reputation beyond reputesquirt has a reputation beyond repute
Default

Driving down the interstate
Running thirty minutes late
Singin' Margaritaville and minding my own
Some foreign car drivin' dude with the road rage attitude
Pulled up beside me talkin' on his cell phone
He started yelling at me like I did something wrong
He flipped me the bird an' then he was gone

Some beach
Somewhere
There's a big umbrella casting shade over an empty chair
Palm trees are growin' and a warm breezes a blowing
I picture myself right there
On Some beach, somewhere

I circled the parkin' lot, tryin' to find a spot
Just big enough I could park my old truck
A man with a big cigar was getting into his car
I stopped and I waited for him to back up
From out of no where a Mercedes Benz
Came cruisin' up and whipped right in

Some beach
Somewhere
There's no where to go when you got all day to get there
There's cold margaritas and hot Senoritas smiling with long dark hair
On some beach
Somewhere

I sit in that waiting room
It seemed like all afternoon
The nurse finally said doc's ready for you
you're not gonna feel a thing we'll give you some novicane
That tooth will be fine in a minute or two
But he stuck that needle down deep in my gum
And he started drillin' before I was numb

Some beach
Somewhere
There's a beautiful sunset burning up the atsmosphere
There's music and dancing and lovers romancing
In the soft evening air
On some beach
Somewhere
On some beach, somewhere


squirt is online now   Reply With Quote
Old 05-23-2008, 03:25 PM   #1022 (permalink)
Super Moderator
 
squirt's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2004
Location: Dallas, TX
Posts: 355,858
Rep Power: 8572
squirt has a reputation beyond reputesquirt has a reputation beyond reputesquirt has a reputation beyond reputesquirt has a reputation beyond reputesquirt has a reputation beyond reputesquirt has a reputation beyond reputesquirt has a reputation beyond reputesquirt has a reputation beyond reputesquirt has a reputation beyond reputesquirt has a reputation beyond reputesquirt has a reputation beyond repute
Default

She was a woman on a mission
Here to drown him and forget him
So I set her up again to wash him down
She had just about succeeded
When that low-down no good cheatin'
Good for nothin' came struttin' through the crowd

Ah he was layin' it on so thick
He never missed a lick
Professing his never ending love
Oh but I never will forget
When she stood up and said
So I guess you think we're just gonna kiss and make up doncha
That's when she said ...

Why don't you kiss, kiss this
And I don't mean on my rosy red lips
Me and you, we're through
And there's only one thing left for you to do
You just come on over here one last time
Pucker up and close yours eyes
And kiss this goodbye

Well the next thing I recall
She had him back against the wall
Chewin' him like a bulldog on a bone
She was puttin' him in his place
And I mean right up in his face
Draggin' him down a list of done me wrongs
Well it was just about now
That the crowd gathered 'round
They've come to watch him pay for his every sin
She called him everything under the sun
And when we thought that she was done
She rared back and she let him have it again, man
She said, she said ...

Kiss this
And I don't mean on my rosy red lips
Me and you, we're through
And there's only one thing left for you to do
You just come on over here one last time
Pucker up and close yours eyes
And kiss this goodbye
Kiss this goodbye
(See ya)


squirt is online now   Reply With Quote
Old 05-24-2008, 11:28 PM   #1023 (permalink)
Super Moderator
 
squirt's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2004
Location: Dallas, TX
Posts: 355,858
Rep Power: 8572
squirt has a reputation beyond reputesquirt has a reputation beyond reputesquirt has a reputation beyond reputesquirt has a reputation beyond reputesquirt has a reputation beyond reputesquirt has a reputation beyond reputesquirt has a reputation beyond reputesquirt has a reputation beyond reputesquirt has a reputation beyond reputesquirt has a reputation beyond reputesquirt has a reputation beyond repute
Default

Sweet temptation, that's what you are to me
That's what you'll always be, it seems
Ah, sweet temptation, you smile and pass me by
But still you occupy my dreams

Baby, I've got a lot of hidden charms
You'd find if you'd just hold me in your arms
But you're just sweet temptation, a diamond in the rough
You make it awful tough on me

Ah, you do, honey

Ah, sweet temptation, the most delicious peach
Is always out of reach, they say
Ah, sweet temptation, you're just a little flirt, squirt
You know, you might get hurt that way

Baby, someday you'll get a big surprise
Find someone who'll make you realise
That you're just sweet temptation, a diamond in the rough
You make it awful tough on me

Baby, someday you'll get a big surprise
Find someone who'll make you realise
That you're just sweet temptation, a diamond in the rough
You make it awful tough for me

Ah, sweet temptation, a diamond in the rough
You make it awful tough for me


squirt is online now   Reply With Quote
Old 05-26-2008, 06:13 PM   #1024 (permalink)
Super Moderator
 
squirt's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2004
Location: Dallas, TX
Posts: 355,858
Rep Power: 8572
squirt has a reputation beyond reputesquirt has a reputation beyond reputesquirt has a reputation beyond reputesquirt has a reputation beyond reputesquirt has a reputation beyond reputesquirt has a reputation beyond reputesquirt has a reputation beyond reputesquirt has a reputation beyond reputesquirt has a reputation beyond reputesquirt has a reputation beyond reputesquirt has a reputation beyond repute
Default

squirt is online now   Reply With Quote
Old 05-29-2008, 11:11 PM   #1025 (permalink)
Super Moderator
 
squirt's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2004
Location: Dallas, TX
Posts: 355,858
Rep Power: 8572
squirt has a reputation beyond reputesquirt has a reputation beyond reputesquirt has a reputation beyond reputesquirt has a reputation beyond reputesquirt has a reputation beyond reputesquirt has a reputation beyond reputesquirt has a reputation beyond reputesquirt has a reputation beyond reputesquirt has a reputation beyond reputesquirt has a reputation beyond reputesquirt has a reputation beyond repute
Default

We were born in this little town
Growin' up I was countin' down
Every single day till we made our get-away
But you said you could never see yourself
Trying to make a life anywhere else
This would be your home
And I was on my own
But ever since you said good-bye
I've been out here on the wind
And baby you would be surprised
All the places you have been

I've seen you in Albuquerque waitin' out a blizzard
Arizona dancin' 'cross the desert
Watchin' the sun set in Monterey
Girl I swear just the other day you were
Down in Georgia pickin' them peaches
Carolina barefoot on the beaches
No matter where you choose to be
In my heart I'll always see you
Everywhere

Now a days when I'm passin' through
The conversation always turns to you
I hear you're doin' fine
Livin' out by the county line
Got a man that's home every night
A couple of kids and the kind of life
That you want to leave
Guess you could say the same for me
But you and I made our choices
All those years ago
Still I know I'll hear your voice
And see you down the road
Maybe in

Oklahoma drivin' 'cross the prairie
In Dallas Texas isn't that where we
Always said we would like to try
But never did so maybe that's why
You're on every highway just beyond the high-beams
Right beside me in all of my sweet dreams
No matter where you choose to be
In my heart I'll always see you In ...

Albuquerque waitin' out a blizzard
Arizona dancin' 'cross the desert
Watchin' the sun set in Monterey
Girl I swear just the other day you were
Down in Georgia pickin' them peaches
Carolina barefoot on the beaches
No matter where you choose to be
In my heart I'll always see you
Everywhere


squirt is online now   Reply With Quote
Old 06-06-2008, 04:05 PM   #1026 (permalink)
Super Moderator
 
squirt's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2004
Location: Dallas, TX
Posts: 355,858
Rep Power: 8572
squirt has a reputation beyond reputesquirt has a reputation beyond reputesquirt has a reputation beyond reputesquirt has a reputation beyond reputesquirt has a reputation beyond reputesquirt has a reputation beyond reputesquirt has a reputation beyond reputesquirt has a reputation beyond reputesquirt has a reputation beyond reputesquirt has a reputation beyond reputesquirt has a reputation beyond repute
Default

She turned up her nose as she walked by my Cadillac
From the corner of my eye I saw you and you laughed
You were sittin' on the swing on your front porch
Paintin' your nails like you were bored
And you yelled, "She was sure impressed with you."

Well I ain't first class but I ain't white trash
I'm wild and a little crazy too
Some girls don't like boys like me
Aww, but some girls do

I yelled and asked if you would like a ride
When we pulled out of your yard, I bald a tire
You was laughin' at me, I was doin' James Dean
You was the prettiest girl I even seen
When you rolled your eyes and twirled my pink fur dice

Well, I ain't first class but I ain't white trash
I'm wild and a little crazy too
Some girls don't like boys like me
Aww, but some girls do

Well good 'ol boys don't get no breaks
And the rich boys think they got what it takes
But there's someone for each of us they say

Well, I ain't first class but I ain't white trash
I'm wild and a little crazy too
Some girls don't like boys like me
Aww, but some girls do

Well, I ain't first class but I ain't white trash
I'm wild and a little crazy too
Some girls don't like boys like me
Aww, but some girls do

I said some girls do
Ya know some girls do
Like boys like me
Ya know some girls do


squirt is online now   Reply With Quote
Old 06-07-2008, 03:26 PM   #1027 (permalink)
Super Moderator
 
squirt's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2004
Location: Dallas, TX
Posts: 355,858
Rep Power: 8572
squirt has a reputation beyond reputesquirt has a reputation beyond reputesquirt has a reputation beyond reputesquirt has a reputation beyond reputesquirt has a reputation beyond reputesquirt has a reputation beyond reputesquirt has a reputation beyond reputesquirt has a reputation beyond reputesquirt has a reputation beyond reputesquirt has a reputation beyond reputesquirt has a reputation beyond repute
Default

Baby all I got is this beat up leather bag
And everything I own don't fill up half
But don't you worry 'bout the way I pack
All I care about is getting back real soon
A goodbye kiss is all I need from you

I'm carrying your love with me
West Virginia down to Tennessee
I'll be movin' with the good Lord's speed
Carrying your love with me
It's my strength for holdin' on
Every minute that I have to be gone
I'll have everything I ever need
Carrying your love with me

On a lonely highway, stuck out in the rain
Darlin' all I have to do is speak your name
The clouds roll back and the waters part
The sun starts shining in my heart for you
You're right there in everything I do, 'cause ...

I'm carrying your love with me
West Virginia down to Tennessee
I'll be movin' with the good Lord's speed
Carrying your love with me
It's my strength for holdin' on
Every minute that I have to be gone
I'll have everything I ever need
Carrying your love with me


squirt is online now   Reply With Quote
Old 06-16-2008, 08:30 PM   #1028 (permalink)
Super Moderator
 
squirt's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2004
Location: Dallas, TX
Posts: 355,858
Rep Power: 8572
squirt has a reputation beyond reputesquirt has a reputation beyond reputesquirt has a reputation beyond reputesquirt has a reputation beyond reputesquirt has a reputation beyond reputesquirt has a reputation beyond reputesquirt has a reputation beyond reputesquirt has a reputation beyond reputesquirt has a reputation beyond reputesquirt has a reputation beyond reputesquirt has a reputation beyond repute
Default

squirt is online now   Reply With Quote
Old 06-20-2008, 11:53 AM   #1029 (permalink)
Super Moderator
 
squirt's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2004
Location: Dallas, TX
Posts: 355,858
Rep Power: 8572
squirt has a reputation beyond reputesquirt has a reputation beyond reputesquirt has a reputation beyond reputesquirt has a reputation beyond reputesquirt has a reputation beyond reputesquirt has a reputation beyond reputesquirt has a reputation beyond reputesquirt has a reputation beyond reputesquirt has a reputation beyond reputesquirt has a reputation beyond reputesquirt has a reputation beyond repute
Default

This woman that takes on the world
And picks up your shirts, keeps it together somehow
This same woman, that melts with your touch
Wants you to feel what I'm feeling right now

'Cause this woman needs
A safe place to land
The strength in your hands
To know you know
What this woman needs
Is somewhere to cry
So lay by my side
And I'll tell you, I'll tell you

This woman needs to be reassured
That my heart's your home and love is what wills you to stay
I need you to see me in every light
And hear that you still think I'm beautiful anyway

'Cause this woman needs
A safe place to land
The strength in your hands
To know you know
What this woman needs
Is somewhere to cry
So lay by my side
And I'll tell you, I'll tell you

What this woman needs
Yeah, yeah, yeah,
Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh
Oh, what this woman needs
Is somewhere to cry
So lay by my side
And I'll tell you, I'll tell you

What this woman needs
Yeah, what this woman needs
Yeah, yeah, yeah -
What this woman needs


squirt is online now   Reply With Quote
Old 06-22-2008, 04:13 PM   #1030 (permalink)
Super Moderator
 
squirt's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2004
Location: Dallas, TX
Posts: 355,858
Rep Power: 8572
squirt has a reputation beyond reputesquirt has a reputation beyond reputesquirt has a reputation beyond reputesquirt has a reputation beyond reputesquirt has a reputation beyond reputesquirt has a reputation beyond reputesquirt has a reputation beyond reputesquirt has a reputation beyond reputesquirt has a reputation beyond reputesquirt has a reputation beyond reputesquirt has a reputation beyond repute
Default

It’s so easy to be lonely in a love this big
Maybe I work too much to give you what I think you want
Especially when you feel like you’re the only one who gives
It don’t take much for me, just a smile from you when I come home
I miss you, I miss us
I don’t know what else I can do
I don’t know how to get through to you

When was the last time you met me at the door with a kiss
I don’t feel pretty I don’t feel like I still get to you
Of all the things you’ve got to do, where am I on your list?
Maybe it’s time I tried stirring you up with something new
A new dress, a late night
Baby that’s just a place to start
But we can’t love this far apart

Somebody’s always gotta be mad
Somebody’s always gotta be hurt
And somebody’s always wrong
Somebody’s always making it hard
Thinkin’ too much, going too far
What are we doing?
This isn’t who we are

We’re not those people
The ones we used to talk about
The ones that just don’t make it
The ones who never work it out

Somebody’s always makin’ it hard
Thinking too much, going too far
What are we doing? What are we doing?
This isn’t who we are

This isn’t who we are …
Who we are …


squirt is online now   Reply With Quote
Reply

Bookmarks

Thread Tools

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is On
Trackbacks are On
Pingbacks are On
Refbacks are On