Join the Jokeroo.com Newsletter and win Monthly Prizes!

Go Back   Jokeroo Community > The Jokers Joint > Famous Quotes

Reply
 
LinkBack Thread Tools
Old 07-11-2008, 06:01 AM   #1 (permalink)
Jokaroo VIP Status
 
brilor's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2004
Location: In between the devil and the deep blue sea!
Posts: 53,147
Rep Power: 2154
brilor has a reputation beyond reputebrilor has a reputation beyond reputebrilor has a reputation beyond reputebrilor has a reputation beyond reputebrilor has a reputation beyond reputebrilor has a reputation beyond reputebrilor has a reputation beyond reputebrilor has a reputation beyond reputebrilor has a reputation beyond reputebrilor has a reputation beyond reputebrilor has a reputation beyond repute
Talking When Insults had Class

When Insults had Class

"He has all the virtues I dislike and none of the vices I admire."
Winston Churchill

"I have never killed a man, but I have read many obituaries with great pleasure."
Clarence Darrow

"He has never been known to use a word that might send a reader to the dictionary."
William Faulkner (about Ernest Hemingway)

"I've had a perfectly wonderful evening. But this wasn't it."
Groucho Marx

"I didn't attend the funeral, but I sent a nice letter saying I approved of it."
Mark Twain

"He has no enemies, but is intensely disliked by his friends."
Oscar Wilde

"I am enclosing two tickets to the first night of my new play; bring a friend... If you have one."
George Bernard Shaw to Winston Churchill... followed by Churchill's response:
"Cannot possibly attend first night, will attend second, if there is one."
Winston Churchill

"I feel so miserable without you; it's almost like having you here."
Stephen Bishop

"He is a self-made man and worships his creator."
John Bright

"I've just learned about his illness. Let's hope it's nothing trivial."
Irvin S. Cobb

"He is not only dull himself; he is the cause of dullness in others."
Samuel Johnson

"He is simply a shiver looking for a spine to run up."
Paul Keating

"He had delusions of adequacy."
Walter Kerr

"Why do you sit there looking like an envelope without any address on it?"
Mark Twain

"His mother should have thrown him away and kept the stork."
Mae West

"Some cause happiness wherever they go; others, whenever they go."
Oscar Wilde


__________________






{Thanks Sexy Sadie}
brilor is online now   Reply With Quote
Old 07-11-2008, 04:31 PM   #2 (permalink)
Super Moderator
 
squirt's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2004
Location: Dallas, TX
Posts: 263,137
Rep Power: 100
squirt has a reputation beyond reputesquirt has a reputation beyond reputesquirt has a reputation beyond reputesquirt has a reputation beyond reputesquirt has a reputation beyond reputesquirt has a reputation beyond reputesquirt has a reputation beyond reputesquirt has a reputation beyond reputesquirt has a reputation beyond reputesquirt has a reputation beyond reputesquirt has a reputation beyond repute
Send a message via Yahoo to squirt
Default

"I didn't attend the funeral, but I sent a nice letter saying I approved of it."
Mark Twain

lmfao ... this is my favorite! lol
__________________





squirt is online now   Reply With Quote
Old 07-11-2008, 05:45 PM   #3 (permalink)
Senior Member
 
Pixsurguy's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2005
Location: Louisville, KY
Posts: 14,471
Rep Power: 622
Pixsurguy has a reputation beyond reputePixsurguy has a reputation beyond reputePixsurguy has a reputation beyond reputePixsurguy has a reputation beyond reputePixsurguy has a reputation beyond reputePixsurguy has a reputation beyond reputePixsurguy has a reputation beyond reputePixsurguy has a reputation beyond reputePixsurguy has a reputation beyond reputePixsurguy has a reputation beyond reputePixsurguy has a reputation beyond repute
Send a message via Yahoo to Pixsurguy
Default

One of the more famous ones attributed to Sir Winston (and certainly my favorite) was in response to a comment by a woman who told him that if he was her husband she'd give him poison. His response? "Madam, if you were my wife, I'd take it."
hehehehehehehehe

Another one that he supposedly said, though I've heard it said by modern stand-up comics a time or two, was where a woman at a party said:

"Sir !! You are drunk!!"

Supposedly he responded as follows:

"Yes, madam, I am drunk. But you are ugly and in the morning I'll be sober".
Pixsurguy is online now   Reply With Quote
Old 07-11-2008, 05:47 PM   #4 (permalink)
Senior Member
 
Pixsurguy's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2005
Location: Louisville, KY
Posts: 14,471
Rep Power: 622
Pixsurguy has a reputation beyond reputePixsurguy has a reputation beyond reputePixsurguy has a reputation beyond reputePixsurguy has a reputation beyond reputePixsurguy has a reputation beyond reputePixsurguy has a reputation beyond reputePixsurguy has a reputation beyond reputePixsurguy has a reputation beyond reputePixsurguy has a reputation beyond reputePixsurguy has a reputation beyond reputePixsurguy has a reputation beyond repute
Send a message via Yahoo to Pixsurguy
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by squirt View Post
"I didn't attend the funeral, but I sent a nice letter saying I approved of it."
Mark Twain

lmfao ... this is my favorite! lol
Squirtypoo (a/k/a the "Squirtmeister" or "Squirtykins") is my favorite.
Pixsurguy is online now   Reply With Quote
Old 07-11-2008, 06:27 PM   #5 (permalink)
Super Moderator
 
squirt's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2004
Location: Dallas, TX
Posts: 263,137
Rep Power: 100
squirt has a reputation beyond reputesquirt has a reputation beyond reputesquirt has a reputation beyond reputesquirt has a reputation beyond reputesquirt has a reputation beyond reputesquirt has a reputation beyond reputesquirt has a reputation beyond reputesquirt has a reputation beyond reputesquirt has a reputation beyond reputesquirt has a reputation beyond reputesquirt has a reputation beyond repute
Send a message via Yahoo to squirt
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by Pixsurguy View Post
One of the more famous ones attributed to Sir Winston (and certainly my favorite) was in response to a comment by a woman who told him that if he was her husband she'd give him poison. His response? "Madam, if you were my wife, I'd take it."
hehehehehehehehe
roflmfao ... touche! lol

Quote:
Originally Posted by Pixsurguy View Post
Squirtypoo (a/k/a the "Squirtmeister" or "Squirtykins") is my favorite.
you sure know how to make a girl feel special, Pix and I mean that with the utmost sincerity!
squirt is online now   Reply With Quote
Old 07-11-2008, 06:30 PM   #6 (permalink)
Senior Member
 
Pixsurguy's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2005
Location: Louisville, KY
Posts: 14,471
Rep Power: 622
Pixsurguy has a reputation beyond reputePixsurguy has a reputation beyond reputePixsurguy has a reputation beyond reputePixsurguy has a reputation beyond reputePixsurguy has a reputation beyond reputePixsurguy has a reputation beyond reputePixsurguy has a reputation beyond reputePixsurguy has a reputation beyond reputePixsurguy has a reputation beyond reputePixsurguy has a reputation beyond reputePixsurguy has a reputation beyond repute
Send a message via Yahoo to Pixsurguy
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by squirt View Post
roflmfao ... touche! lol



you sure know how to make a girl feel special, Pix and I mean that with the utmost sincerity!
Big ol' Kentucky smiles
Pixsurguy is online now   Reply With Quote
Old 08-25-2008, 11:35 PM   #7 (permalink)
Jokaroo VIP Status
 
lil_ms_grouch712003's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2004
Location: ~*~In Love,Peace & Happiness~*~
Posts: 132,453
Rep Power: 5553
lil_ms_grouch712003 has a reputation beyond reputelil_ms_grouch712003 has a reputation beyond reputelil_ms_grouch712003 has a reputation beyond reputelil_ms_grouch712003 has a reputation beyond reputelil_ms_grouch712003 has a reputation beyond reputelil_ms_grouch712003 has a reputation beyond reputelil_ms_grouch712003 has a reputation beyond reputelil_ms_grouch712003 has a reputation beyond reputelil_ms_grouch712003 has a reputation beyond reputelil_ms_grouch712003 has a reputation beyond reputelil_ms_grouch712003 has a reputation beyond repute
Default

lmao
__________________






lil_ms_grouch712003 is offline   Reply With Quote
Reply

Bookmarks

Thread Tools

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is On
Trackbacks are On
Pingbacks are On
Refbacks are On


Inactive Reminders By Icora Web Design

Search Engine Friendly URLs by vBSEO 3.2.0