Todays Blonde Joke...... - Page 52

LAWRENCE · 08-19-2009, 02:10 PM

A young Blonde woman had been taking golf lessons. She had just
started playing her first round of golf when she suffered a bee sting. The
pain was so intense that she decided to return to the clubhouse.
Her golf pro saw her come into the clubhouse and asked, "Why back
in so early? What's wrong? "
"I was stung by a bee."
"Where?" he asked.
"Between the first and second hole," she replied.
He nodded knowingly and said, "Then your stance is too wide."

konifur2 · 08-20-2009, 04:35 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by LAWRENCE

A young Blonde woman had been taking golf lessons. She had just
started playing her first round of golf when she suffered a bee sting. The
pain was so intense that she decided to return to the clubhouse.
Her golf pro saw her come into the clubhouse and asked, "Why back
in so early? What's wrong? "
"I was stung by a bee."
"Where?" he asked.
"Between the first and second hole," she replied.
He nodded knowingly and said, "Then your stance is too wide."

LOL......

...is that bit of skin between the 1st and 2nd hole called a chin rest.

hortysir · 08-20-2009, 03:58 PM

I call it "taint"

konifur2 · 08-21-2009, 04:28 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by hortysir

I call it "taint"

LOL. i`m sure that is what bamber calls it. * thinks* then again,bamber the brainbox will probably call it a Perineum.

Bamber · 08-21-2009, 04:41 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by konifur2

LOL. i`m sure that is what bamber calls it. * thinks* then again,bamber the brainbox will probably call it a Perineum.

Correct!
When I was a teenager up in Lancashire it was called the biffon, because its the are your balls "biff on" during sex.
"You don't want to go out with Sheila! That lass has blakeys on her biffon!"

konifur2 · 08-21-2009, 04:45 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Bamber

Correct!
When I was a teenager up in Lancashire it was called the biffon, because its the are your balls "biff on" during sex.
"You don't want to go out with Sheila! That lass has blakeys on her biffon!"

see, you is a northern lad at heart.ain`t ya bonnylad

Bamber · 08-21-2009, 04:54 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by konifur2

see, you is a northern lad at heart.ain`t ya bonnylad

Midland lad actually, born in Warwickshire within spitting distance of Leicestershire, Staffordshire and Derbyshire.

konifur2 · 08-21-2009, 05:01 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Bamber

Midland lad actually, born in Warwickshire within spitting distance of Leicestershire, Staffordshire and Derbyshire.

some call anyone north of London northerers.

i knew a lad from Warwickshire,his mum had a sence of humour and called him Warwick.... only trouble is his surname is Hunt.

LAWRENCE · 08-22-2009, 01:18 AM

A young Blonde, feeling morning dizziness and strange cravings, goes
to see a gynecologist.

After a thorough examination, the Doctor tells her:

"Well, my dear, I am puzzled; the test shows that you are pregnant,
but when I examined you, I found that you are still a virgin. I
mean, your hymen is not ruptured, except for seven tiny holes, a
little more that pinpricks, actually.... by the way, what did you
say your name was?"

"My name is Snow White", replies the girl.

LAWRENCE · 08-22-2009, 04:29 AM

A man met a beautiful blonde lady and decided he wanted to marry her right away.

She said, "But we don't know anything about each other."

He said, "That's all right, we'll learn about each other as we go along.."

So she consented, they were married, and off they went on a honeymoon at a very nice resort.

One morning they were laying by the pool, when he got up off of his towel, climbed up to the 10 meter board and did a two and a half tuck gainer, followed by three rotations in a jackknife position, at which point he straightened out and cut the water like a knife.

After a few more demonstrations, he came back and lay down on the towel.

She said, "That was incredible!"

He said, "I used to be an Olympic diving champion. You see, I told you we'd learn more about ourselves as we went along."

So she got up, jumped in the pool, and started doing laps. After about fifty laps she climbed back out and lay down on her towel, hardly out of breath.

He said, "That was incredible! Were you an Olympic endurance swimmer?"

"No," she said, "I was a hooker in Hull, Quebec, and I worked both sides of the river."

08-19-2009, 02:10 PM	#511 (permalink)
LAWRENCE Senior Member Join Date: May 2004 Location: VANCOUVER ISLAND CANADA Posts: 8,117 Rep Power: 1914	A young Blonde woman had been taking golf lessons. She had just started playing her first round of golf when she suffered a bee sting. The pain was so intense that she decided to return to the clubhouse. Her golf pro saw her come into the clubhouse and asked, "Why back in so early? What's wrong? " "I was stung by a bee." "Where?" he asked. "Between the first and second hole," she replied. He nodded knowingly and said, "Then your stance is too wide." __________________ ******************

08-22-2009, 01:18 AM	#519 (permalink)
LAWRENCE Senior Member Join Date: May 2004 Location: VANCOUVER ISLAND CANADA Posts: 8,117 Rep Power: 1914	A young Blonde, feeling morning dizziness and strange cravings, goes to see a gynecologist. After a thorough examination, the Doctor tells her: "Well, my dear, I am puzzled; the test shows that you are pregnant, but when I examined you, I found that you are still a virgin. I mean, your hymen is not ruptured, except for seven tiny holes, a little more that pinpricks, actually.... by the way, what did you say your name was?" "My name is Snow White", replies the girl. __________________ ******************

08-22-2009, 04:29 AM	#520 (permalink)
LAWRENCE Senior Member Join Date: May 2004 Location: VANCOUVER ISLAND CANADA Posts: 8,117 Rep Power: 1914	A man met a beautiful blonde lady and decided he wanted to marry her right away. She said, "But we don't know anything about each other." He said, "That's all right, we'll learn about each other as we go along.." So she consented, they were married, and off they went on a honeymoon at a very nice resort. One morning they were laying by the pool, when he got up off of his towel, climbed up to the 10 meter board and did a two and a half tuck gainer, followed by three rotations in a jackknife position, at which point he straightened out and cut the water like a knife. After a few more demonstrations, he came back and lay down on the towel. She said, "That was incredible!" He said, "I used to be an Olympic diving champion. You see, I told you we'd learn more about ourselves as we went along." So she got up, jumped in the pool, and started doing laps. After about fifty laps she climbed back out and lay down on her towel, hardly out of breath. He said, "That was incredible! Were you an Olympic endurance swimmer?" "No," she said, "I was a hooker in Hull, Quebec, and I worked both sides of the river." __________________ ******************

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08-20-2009, 03:58 PM	#513 (permalink)
hortysir Senior Member Join Date: Jan 2004 Location: South...Thank God! Posts: 19,829 Rep Power: 3575	I call it "taint"