Redneck's New Job

[squirt]

Originally Posted by Iceman

Yep, you only go around once, so I am going to give it my best shot this time...lol My biggest fear is not getting to do something that I really wanted to do and I haven't missed too many...lol

not alot of people can say that lol I've still a couple of things on my "to do" list, like seeing the Northern Lights lol

[Iceman]

Originally Posted by squirt

not alot of people can say that lol I've still a couple of things on my "to do" list, like seeing the Northern Lights lol

The only things that I have always wanted to see but haven't, is the Grand ole Opra, and the shows at Branson. Maybe someday...lol

[squirt]

Originally Posted by Iceman

The only things that I have always wanted to see but haven't, is the Grand ole Opra, and the shows at Branson. Maybe someday...lol

hubby wants to dive the Great Barrier Reef and I'd love to go overseas some day, have only traveled this continent, Canada, the States and Mexico lol

[mountainlion20032003]

Originally Posted by Iceman

A Redneck From Georgia Decides To Travel Across The South To Virginia To
See God's Country.

When He Gets To Franklin, He Likes The Place So Much That He Decides
To Stay. But First He Must Find A Job!!!!

He Walks Into The International Paper Company Office And Fills Out An
Application As An Experienced Log Inspector. It's His Lucky
Day!!! They Just Happen To Be Looking For Someone, But First, The Log
Foreman Takes Him For A Ride Into The Forest In The Company Pickup Truck
To See How Much He Knows.
The Foreman Stops The Truck On The Side Of The Road And Points At A
Tree. "see That Tree Over There? I Want You
To Tell Me What Species It
Is And How Many Board Feet Of Lumber It Contains."

The Redneck Promptly Answers, "that Thar's A Whitepine, 383 Board Feet
Of Lumber In 'er."

The Foreman Is Impressed!!! He Puts The Truck In Motion And Stops
About
A Mile Down The Road. He Points At Another Tree Through The Passenger
Window And Asks The Same Question. This Time, It's A Bigger Tree Of A
Different Class.

That's A Loblolly Pine And She's Got About 456 Clear Board Feet.
The Foreman Is Really Impressed With The Good Ol' Boy, He Has Been
Quick And Got The Answers Right Without Using A Calculator!! One More
Test.
They Drive A Little Further Down The Road, And The Foreman Stops
Again. This Time, He Points Across The Road Through His Driver Side
Window And Says, "and What About That One?"
Before The Foreman Finishes Pointing, The Redneck Says, "white Oak, 242
Board Feet At Best"
The Foreman Spins The Truck
Around And Heads Back To The Office A Little
Ticked Off Because He Thinks The Red Neck Is Smarter Than He Is.
As They Near The Office, The Foreman Stops The Truck And Asks Bubba To
Step Outside. He Hands Him A Piece Of Chalk And Tells Him,
"see That
Tree Over There?" I Want You To Mark An X On The Front Of That
Tree!!

The Foreman Thinks To Himself, "idiot, How Would He Know Which Is The
Front Of The Tree?"
When Bubba Reaches The Tree, He Goes Around It In A Circle While Looking
At The Ground. He Then Reaches Up And Places A White X On The Trunk.

He Walks Back To The Foreman And Hands Him The Chalk. "that Thar's
The Front", The Redneck Says.

The Foreman Laughs To Himself And Asks Sarcastically, "how Do You
Know That's The Front Of The Tree?"

The Good Ol' Boy Looks Down At His Feet, While Rubbing The Toe Of His
Left Boot Cleaning It In The Gravel And Replies, "cuz Somebody Took A
Poop
Behind It!"
He Got The Job And Is Now The Foreman!!

LOL! Smart man.

[Iceman]

Originally Posted by squirt

hubby wants to dive the Great Barrier Reef and I'd love to go overseas some day, have only traveled this continent, Canada, the States and Mexico lol

Never been to Canada, but been to Old Mexico 5 times. I wouldn't care about going overseas because I am not going to fly anywhere..Not real fond of ships either..lol

[Iceman]

Originally Posted by mountainlion20032003

LOL! Smart man.

He sure came up with all the right answers..lol

[Huggies]

Originally Posted by Iceman

Never been to Canada, but been to Old Mexico 5 times. I wouldn't care about going overseas because I am not going to fly anywhere..Not real fond of ships either..lol

Come to Canada I'll show you around..hehehe.

[Iceman]

Originally Posted by Huggies

Come to Canada I'll show you around..hehehe.

I think you know what I would want if I came to Canada...lol

[Huggies]

Originally Posted by Iceman

I think you know what I would want if I came to Canada...lol

Sight seeing? hehehe.

[squirt]

Originally Posted by Iceman

Never been to Canada, but been to Old Mexico 5 times. I wouldn't care about going overseas because I am not going to fly anywhere..Not real fond of ships either..lol

it doesn't bother me to fly, would rather fly than go by ship! lol plan on going back to Canada too, to see the other half and on to Alaska! lol