Exercising Advice

LAWRENCE · 10-31-2008, 11:50 AM

1. For every mile you jog, you add one minute to your life. This enables you, at the age of 85, to spend an additional five months in a nursing home at $5,000/month.

2. The only reason I took up jogging was to hear heavy breathing again.

3. I joined a health club last year, spending $500 in the process. I haven't lost a pound. Apparently you have to show up.

4. I have to exercise early in the morning, before my brain figures out what I'm doing.

5. I like long walks, especially when they are taken by people who annoy me.

6. The advantage to exercising every day is that you die healthier.

7. I have flabby thighs but fortunately my stomach covers them.

8. If you are going to take up cross-country skiing, it helps to start with a small country.

9. I don't jog; it makes me spill my milk shake.

10. Actually, I don't exercise at all. If we were meant to touch our toes, we would have them farther up on our body.

**squirt** · 10-31-2008, 11:54 AM

3. I joined a health club last year, spending $500 in the process. I haven't lost a pound. Apparently you have to show up

lmao ... that does tend to help a bit! lol

10-31-2008, 11:50 AM	#1 (permalink)
LAWRENCE Senior Member Join Date: May 2004 Location: VANCOUVER ISLAND CANADA Posts: 6,387 Rep Power: 661	Exercising Advice 1. For every mile you jog, you add one minute to your life. This enables you, at the age of 85, to spend an additional five months in a nursing home at $5,000/month. 2. The only reason I took up jogging was to hear heavy breathing again. 3. I joined a health club last year, spending $500 in the process. I haven't lost a pound. Apparently you have to show up. 4. I have to exercise early in the morning, before my brain figures out what I'm doing. 5. I like long walks, especially when they are taken by people who annoy me. 6. The advantage to exercising every day is that you die healthier. 7. I have flabby thighs but fortunately my stomach covers them. 8. If you are going to take up cross-country skiing, it helps to start with a small country. 9. I don't jog; it makes me spill my milk shake. 10. Actually, I don't exercise at all. If we were meant to touch our toes, we would have them farther up on our body. __________________ ******************

10-31-2008, 11:54 AM	#2 (permalink)
squirt Super Moderator Join Date: May 2004 Location: Dallas, TX Posts: 263,181 Rep Power: 100	3. I joined a health club last year, spending $500 in the process. I haven't lost a pound. Apparently you have to show up lmao ... that does tend to help a bit! lol __________________