Mackem jokes - Page 2

anna_hun · 04-18-2009, 02:12 PM

Q: What does a Geordie lass put behind her ears to make her more attractive to men? A: Her feet.

anna_hun · 04-18-2009, 02:12 PM

Q: Why does a Geordie lass only have short dinner breaks when working? A: To avoid re-training.

Q: What's the difference between a Geordie lass and a sea monster? A: A sea monster doesn't put its phone number in your pocket after eating seaman.

anna_hun · 04-18-2009, 02:13 PM

Q: What has a Geordie lass and a computer got in common? A: You don't appreciate them until they go down on you.

anna_hun · 04-18-2009, 02:14 PM

Q: What's a Geordie lass idea of safe sex? A: Keeping the handbrake on.

Q What have a 3 pin plug and Newcastle United got in common.
A Their both completely useless in Europe.

anna_hun · 04-18-2009, 02:16 PM

Two Mags are walking along. One of them picks up a mirror, looks in it, and says "Hey, I know that bloke" The second one picks it up and says "Of course you do, Hinney - its me!"

anna_hun · 04-18-2009, 02:16 PM

Q: How many Geordie lass does it take to screw in a light bulb? A: None, they only screw in cars.

**squirt** · 04-18-2009, 02:16 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by anna_hun

Q: What does a Geordie lass put behind her ears to make her more attractive to men? A: Her feet.

not an easy task! lol

anna_hun · 04-18-2009, 02:23 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by squirt

not an easy task! lol

not quiet suitable for all occasions..lmbo

omg-that reminds me now of my sigtag you made me...haha

anna_hun · 04-18-2009, 02:24 PM

Geordie Sayings
(Extracts from The
Fairly Truthful Guide to Geordie)

Chaalkin’ on the bleezer
Not speaking to each other

Gettin’ off at Manors
Not finishing the job – Method of birth control

Wey aa’ll stand tappin’
I’m flabbergasted. That is a surprise!

Huw’s it hingin’?
How’s life treating you?

Aadivvenwannee
I’d rather not

Yedivvenhattee
You don’t have to

Eegannin?
Are you going?

Eeganaganwiwu?
Would you like to come with us?

He’s a reet heed-the-baall
He’s mad as a hatter

S’narf snaa’n
It is snowing heavily

Givin’ it six nowt
Putting in maximum effort

anna_hun · 04-18-2009, 02:25 PM

Medical Terms
(Extracts from The
Fairly Truthful Guide to Geordie)

Snottysneck
Common cold

Stottinheed
Headache

Oot o’ lamp oil
Poor sight

Bad wi’ the beor
Hangover

Gettn’ the smitt
Becoming infected

Cannaswallie
Sore throat

Skitters
Diarrhoea

Arse like a Mackem rosette
Inflamed haemorrhoids

Similar Threads
Thread	Thread Starter	Forum	Replies	Last Post
Why We Forward Jokes............	mountainlion20032003	Chicken Soup	10	07-26-2005 10:55 PM
Why We Forward Jokes	handymanmike92683	Funny Jokes	2	10-27-2004 09:44 AM
Why We Forward Jokes	handymanmike92683	Funny Jokes	3	08-07-2004 03:21 PM
Old Timers	LovinLifeSingle7	Funny Jokes	0	06-18-2004 08:42 AM
jokes jokes jokes ..	lala dada	The Society	13	02-22-2004 04:10 AM

Jokeroo

My Account

Help & Info

04-18-2009, 02:12 PM	#11 (permalink)
anna_hun Jokaroo VIP Status Join Date: May 2004 Location: In my own world, but its ok, they know me here! Posts: 50,744 Rep Power: 5326	Q: What does a Geordie lass put behind her ears to make her more attractive to men? A: Her feet.

04-18-2009, 02:12 PM	#12 (permalink)
anna_hun Jokaroo VIP Status Join Date: May 2004 Location: In my own world, but its ok, they know me here! Posts: 50,744 Rep Power: 5326	Q: Why does a Geordie lass only have short dinner breaks when working? A: To avoid re-training. Q: What's the difference between a Geordie lass and a sea monster? A: A sea monster doesn't put its phone number in your pocket after eating seaman.

04-18-2009, 02:13 PM	#13 (permalink)
anna_hun Jokaroo VIP Status Join Date: May 2004 Location: In my own world, but its ok, they know me here! Posts: 50,744 Rep Power: 5326	Q: What has a Geordie lass and a computer got in common? A: You don't appreciate them until they go down on you.

04-18-2009, 02:14 PM	#14 (permalink)
anna_hun Jokaroo VIP Status Join Date: May 2004 Location: In my own world, but its ok, they know me here! Posts: 50,744 Rep Power: 5326	Q: What's a Geordie lass idea of safe sex? A: Keeping the handbrake on. Q What have a 3 pin plug and Newcastle United got in common. A Their both completely useless in Europe.

04-18-2009, 02:16 PM	#15 (permalink)
anna_hun Jokaroo VIP Status Join Date: May 2004 Location: In my own world, but its ok, they know me here! Posts: 50,744 Rep Power: 5326	Two Mags are walking along. One of them picks up a mirror, looks in it, and says "Hey, I know that bloke" The second one picks it up and says "Of course you do, Hinney - its me!"

04-18-2009, 02:16 PM	#16 (permalink)
anna_hun Jokaroo VIP Status Join Date: May 2004 Location: In my own world, but its ok, they know me here! Posts: 50,744 Rep Power: 5326	Q: How many Geordie lass does it take to screw in a light bulb? A: None, they only screw in cars.

04-18-2009, 02:24 PM	#19 (permalink)
anna_hun Jokaroo VIP Status Join Date: May 2004 Location: In my own world, but its ok, they know me here! Posts: 50,744 Rep Power: 5326	Geordie Sayings (Extracts from The Fairly Truthful Guide to Geordie) Chaalkin’ on the bleezer Not speaking to each other Gettin’ off at Manors Not finishing the job – Method of birth control Wey aa’ll stand tappin’ I’m flabbergasted. That is a surprise! Huw’s it hingin’? How’s life treating you? Aadivvenwannee I’d rather not Yedivvenhattee You don’t have to Eegannin? Are you going? Eeganaganwiwu? Would you like to come with us? He’s a reet heed-the-baall He’s mad as a hatter S’narf snaa’n It is snowing heavily Givin’ it six nowt Putting in maximum effort

04-18-2009, 02:25 PM	#20 (permalink)
anna_hun Jokaroo VIP Status Join Date: May 2004 Location: In my own world, but its ok, they know me here! Posts: 50,744 Rep Power: 5326	Medical Terms (Extracts from The Fairly Truthful Guide to Geordie) Snottysneck Common cold Stottinheed Headache Oot o’ lamp oil Poor sight Bad wi’ the beor Hangover Gettn’ the smitt Becoming infected Cannaswallie Sore throat Skitters Diarrhoea Arse like a Mackem rosette Inflamed haemorrhoids