Konifur`s simple home remedies

[konifur2]

1. If you're choking on an ice cube simply pour a cup of boiling water down your throat. Presto! The blockage will instantly remove itself.



2. Avoid cutting yourself when slicing vegetables by getting someone else to hold them while you chop.



3. Avoid arguments with the Mrs. about lifting the toilet seat by using the sink.



4. For high blood pressure sufferers: simply cut yourself and bleed for a few minutes, thus reducing the pressure in your veins. Remember to use a timer.



5. A mouse trap, placed on top of your alarm clock, will prevent you from rolling over and going back to sleep after you hit the snooze button.



6. If you have a bad cough, take a large dose of laxatives, then you'll be afraid to cough.



7. You only need two tools in life - WD-40 and Duct Tape. If it doesn't move and should, use the WD-40. If it shouldn't move and does, use the duct tape.



8. Remember: Everyone seems normal until you get to know them.



Konifur`s Daily Thought:
SOME PEOPLE ARE LIKE SLINKIES. NOT REALLY GOOD FOR ANYTHING BUT THEY BRING A SMILE TO YOUR FACE WHEN PUSHED DOWN THE STAIRS.

[sexysadie]

Sooooo ahhhh Mr.K, I`m cooking up a stew today and well, I was thinking about cutting up some veggies..lol..wanna come over and help me?

I know what you're thinking and you're wrong, this has nothing to do with your recent post of home remedies, I just thought it would be nice that's all. Besides, I made a soup a couple of days ago and my fingers are still kinda sore...

[konifur2]

Originally Posted by sexysadie

Sooooo ahhhh Mr.K, I`m cooking up a stew today and well, I was thinking about cutting up some veggies..lol..wanna come over and help me?

I know what you're thinking and you're wrong, this has nothing to do with your recent post of home remedies, I just thought it would be nice that's all. Besides, I made a soup a couple of days ago and my fingers are still kinda sore...

Of course i can come and help you in the kitchen.i am finished cleaning the girls rooms.
Do you want me naked or wearing my chefs whites.i rather come to see you in the latter in case i scauld my bits and bobs.

i can get my kit off when i`m there if you have a pinny for me to wear.

[squirt]

if you piss in the sink, I'll use your toothbrush to clean it lol

[sexysadie]

Originally Posted by konifur2

Of course i can come and help you in the kitchen.i am finished cleaning the girls rooms.
Do you want me naked or wearing my chefs whites.i rather come to see you in the latter in case i scauld my bits and bobs.

i can get my kit off when i`m there if you have a pinny for me to wear.

Ohhh by all means, wear the whites Mr.K..lol..I`ll show you later what that does to me...

[hortysir]