Memo to all employees:
In order to assure the highest levels of quality work and productivity from
employees, it will be our policy to keep all employees well trained through
our program of: SPECIAL HIGH INTENSITY TRAINING (S.H.I.T)
We are trying to give our employees more S.H.I.T than anyone else. If you
feel that you do not receive your share of S.H.I.T on the course, please see
your supervisor. You will be immediately placed at the top of the S.H.I.T
list, and our supervisors are especially skilled at seeing you get all the
S.H.I.T. you can handle.
Employees who don't take their S.H.I.T. will be placed in DEPARTMENTAL
EMPLOYEE EVALUATION PROGRAMS (D.E.E.P.S.H.I.T).
Those who fail to take D.E.E.P. S.H.I.T seriously will have to go to
EMPLOYEE ATTITUDE TRAINING (E.A.T.S.H.I.T).
Since our supervisors took S.H.I.T before they were promoted, they don't
have to take S.H.I.T anymore, and are all full of S.H.I.T already.
If you are full of S.H.I.T, you may be interested in a job teaching others.
We can add your name to our BASIC UNDERSTANDING LIST of LEADERS
For employees who are intending to pursue a career in management and
consulting, we will refer you to the department of MANAGERIAL OPERATIONAL
RESEARCH EDUCATION (M.O.R.E.S.H.I.T).
This course emphasizes how to manage M.O.R.E. S.H.I.T
If you have further questions, please direct them to our HEAD OF TEACHING,
SPECIAL HIGH INTENSITY TRAINING (H.O.T.S.H.I.T).
BOSS IN GENERAL, SPECIAL HIGH INTENSITY TRAINING (B.I.G.S.H.I.T)
P.S. Now send this S.H.I.T to 5 people who need S.H.I.T in their life, just
not the same person who sent you this S.H.I.T
They have already had their fill of S.H.I.T
Thank you for your time.
The Director Under Main Bureau of Super High Intensity Training. (The