The husband was furious when he found out the checking account was
empty. When he confronted his wife, she simply said, "It's my turn."
"What do you mean, your turn?" yelled the husband. "In bed," she
explained, "you've been making early withdrawals for years. Now, it's
A woman walked into the pharmacy and asked for a vibrator. The
pharmacist gestured with his index finger and said, "Come this way."
"If I could come that way," she said, "I wouldn't need a vibrator!"
A man was brought before the judge and charged with necrophilia. The
judge told him, "In 20 years on the bench, I've never heard such a
disgusting, immoral thing.
Just give me one good reason why I shouldn't lock you up and throw away the key!"
The man replied, "I'll give you three good reasons;
#1, It's none of your damn business;
#2, She was my wife; and, lastly,
#3, I didn't know she was dead; she always acted
What's the definition of a healthy virgin?
One who has never been bed-ridden!