The Special Lady in Your Life

[sexysadie]

My son treats me very well, he respects me and loves me with all of his heart and soul, I know that and he doesn`t mind telling me how he feels. BUT...he loves his girlfriend as well, not only do I know this, but I love knowing it. I would expect him to put her first and foremost, especially when she becomes his wife, she should be the main interest in his world.
Marriage is a partnership. It`s not only about how long you`ve been together, although that`s something in itself, but it`s what you`ve done with that time. I know a woman who hardly ever see`s her husband, and he not only likes it that way, he tells people that if they were to spend more time together, they`d definately be divorced. So..the woman spends endless hours on the internet, talking to strangers, living a fantasy life, falling deeper and deeper into the fiction that she calls reality, while her husband works and spends most of his free time at a bar getting drunk and eyeing other women. Is this a marriage? Because they've managed to stay together for almost 40 years, does that make it all right? I think I'd rather be single and alone than have a relationship bulit on fiction and fantasy.

In my opinion, if a man thinks of his mother first, it's for one of two reasons...either he respects his mother too much, or his wife too little, sometimes that's not entirely his doing. The manner in which a man treats his wife and mother is nothing but a reflection of the relationship that he has with them on an individual basis. A woman only endures in her marriage that which she allows to take place. That being said, I will close in saying that I respect the institute of marriage, I just dont' want to be institutionalized at the moment..lol...thanks for listening. Sadie...out!

[hortysir]

Anyone that saw how stricken I was when my Mom passed knows how much of a mamma's boy I am (was).
It was pretty much just me and her for the 1st seven years, followed by an asshole, followed by another asshole....so I always held a special place in my heart for my mom.
As far as choosing her over my wife?
Never been faced with that choice, but it would've been a simple one:
Mom would win, hands down.
I know the Bible tells you to leave your parents behind and take a spouse, but i could have several wives and still only have one Mom....

[sexysadie]

Originally Posted by hortysir

Anyone that saw how stricken I was when my Mom passed knows how much of a mamma's boy I am (was).
It was pretty much just me and her for the 1st seven years, followed by an asshole, followed by another asshole....so I always held a special place in my heart for my mom.
As far as choosing her over my wife?
Never been faced with that choice, but it would've been a simple one:
Mom would win, hands down.
I know the Bible tells you to leave your parents behind and take a spouse, but i could have several wives and still only have one Mom....

That's precious. BUT....did your wife know this from day one? I, myself, would have to know where I stood BEFORE I take that leap of faith. (marriage) if not then it could cause a whole lot of problems later on....agree? I, myself, wouldn't necessarily feel threatened by this depending on how far it went. I mean, If it was our anniversary and your mom needed you to do something for her that would keep us from spending it together, then get outta my way cause that means trouble with a capital T mister..lol. But I think you're sweet.

[hortysir]

She knew it coming in....but I wouldn't let it get that extreme, either.
I can recall times when, Mom called to ask me to do something, I'd have to say "as soon as me and wife get done with such-n-such" or "I gotta do this with the wife first"
Communication is the key to everything.
Long as everyone knows the rules

[sexysadie]

Originally Posted by hortysir

She knew it coming in....but I wouldn't let it get that extreme, either.
I can recall times when, Mom called to ask me to do something, I'd have to say "as soon as me and wife get done with such-n-such" or "I gotta do this with the wife first"
Communication is the key to everything.
Long as everyone knows the rules

Right there, you put your wife first, which is what any normal loving husband would do. If you had said that you'd drop everything to be at mom's side no matter what, then I'd worry...lol My son is a mama's boy as well, you can ask anyone, always has been and always will be, but he loves his wife to be enough to put me off once in a while and I love him enough to accept that. Communication IS the key, you're right, along with respect and trust, and that goes both ways. Sadie....out!..lol

[hortysir]

I'd still respect you in the morning....

[sexysadie]

Originally Posted by hortysir

I'd still respect you in the morning....

Really? Then I'd have to try harder..lol

[LilMissPurrfect]

I don't think that what was said was offending to his wife.....and I don't think it was even meant that way......the love for a wife and a mother are 2 completely different kind of loves......but I can understand when a man says that his mother is the special woman in his life.
After all she was the one that gave birth to him....who raised him to the man he is now...who has loves him unconditional.
In most cases there is a bond between mothers and sons. That does not make him a mommy's boy. In my eyes that makes him a responsible man who now as a mature man looks after his mother.

Of course a mother must let her son "go" after he is married...but the wife must also accept that her husband is still his mother's son.
Although that both have different kind of love for him...they both want the best for him.....so not work in harmony and find a balance.

In our culture you must have the utmost respect for your parents in law. On both sides.....
And if you are "lucky" to marry the oldest son of the family....you move into their house!!!

[squirt]

best to just get along lol

[LilMissPurrfect]

Originally Posted by squirt

best to just get along lol

Don't they say that most accidents happen at home?