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Thread: Racist jokes

  1. #81
    Jokeroo VIP Status TakinMyLyfeBack's Avatar
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    Default Re: Racist jokes

    If Whites and blacks had a war, what would it be called?
    KKK vs KFC!

  2. #82
    Jokeroo VIP Status TakinMyLyfeBack's Avatar
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    Default Re: Racist jokes

    What does obamas CHANGE mean?
    Come Help A Nigger Get Elected

  3. #83
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    Default Re: Racist jokes

    Did you hear Hallmark was making an obama Christmas ornament?
    They want to give Americans the gift they all want, that nigger hanging in a tree!

  4. #84
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    Default Re: Racist jokes

    How do you know Noah was a White man?
    No nigger could stay on a boat for 40 days without eating the chickens!

  5. #85
    Super Moderator kipper's Avatar
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    Default Re: Racist jokes

    I’m living next door to a Pakistani couple at the moment. They have
    3 little kids and they’ve challenged me to a water fight in the back
    yard, so I’m just writing this while the kettle boils!

  6. #86
    Super Moderator kipper's Avatar
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    Default Re: Racist jokes

    Can you spare just $2? Ranji is a 9yr old boy living in Namibia .
    He has only 1 leg, 1 arm and 1 eye. Each day he has to ride 7 miles
    to school along a narrow road on a rusty bike with bent wheels, no
    brakes and only 1 pedal. If you send us just $2, we will send you the
    video – its fucking hilarious.

  7. #87
    Jokeroo Enthusiast konifur's Avatar
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    Default Re: Racist jokes

    TWO Pakistani men emigrate to Scotland , and agree to meet two years later to see who has become the most Scottish.
    Two years pass.


    They meet and the first one says "I have a Scotland football jersey,
    I drink Scotch whisky and eat haggis every week, I've joined a pipe
    band, I own a Scottie dog, I wear a kilt everywhere, I salmon fish
    and I play golf .........


    That's how Scottish I am.
    How Scottish have you become?"





    The second one replies, "AWAY TAE FUCK YA PAKI BASTART!"



  8. #88
    Administrator squirt's Avatar
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    Default Re: Racist jokes

    Worldwide Terrorist Alert Levels

    The English are feeling the pinch in relation to recent terrorist threats, and have therefore raised their security level from "Miffed" to "Peeved". Soon, though, security levels may be raised yet again to "Irritated" or even "A Bit Cross". The English have not been "A Bit Cross" since the blitz in1940, when tea supplies nearly ran out. Terrorists have been re-categorized from Tiresome" to "A Bloody Nuisance". The last time the British issued a "Bloody Nuisance" warning level was in 1588, when threatened by the Spanish Armada.

    The Scots have raised their threat level from "Pissed Off" to "Let's get the Bastards". They don't have any other levels. This is the reason they have been used on the front line of the British army for the last 300 years.

    The French government announced yesterday that it has raised its terror alert level from "Run" to "Hide". The only two higher levels in France are "Collaborate" and "Surrender". The rise was precipitated by a recent fire that destroyed France's white flag factory, effectively paralyzing the country's military capability.

    Italy has increased the alert level from "Shout Loudly and Excitedly" to "Elaborate Military Posturing". Two more levels remain: "Ineffective Combat Operations" and "Change Sides".

    The Germans have increased their alert state from "Disdainful Arrogance" to "Dress in Uniform and Sing Marching Songs". They also have two higher levels: "Invade a Neighbour" and "Lose".

    Belgians, on the other hand, are all on holiday as usual; the only threat they are worried about is NATO pulling out of Brussels.

    The Spanish are all excited to see their new submarines ready to deploy. These beautifully designed subs have glass bottoms so the new Spanish navy can get a really good look at the old Spanish navy.

    Americans meanwhile, and as usual, are carrying out pre-emptive strikes on all of their allies "just in case".

    New Zealand has raised its security levels - from "baaa" to "BAAAA". Due to continuing defence cutbacks, New Zealand has only one more level of escalation, which is "I hope Australia will come and rescue us".

    Australia, meanwhile, has raised its security level from "No worries" to "She'll be alright, mate". Three more escalation levels remain: "Crikey!", "I think we'll need to cancel the barbie this weekend" and "The barbie is cancelled". So far no situation has ever warranted use of the final escalation level.

  9. #89
    Administrator squirt's Avatar
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    Default Re: Racist jokes

    LAW ... CAN'T FIRE THE MINORITIES

    Boss, to four of his employees: "I'm really sorry, but I'm going to have to let one of you go."

    Black Employee: "I'm a protected minority."

    Female Employee: "And I'm a woman."

    Oldest Employee: "Fire me, buster, and I'll hit you with an age discrimination suit so fast it'll make your head spin."

    ...To which they all turn to look at the helpless young, white, male employee, who thinks a moment, then responds: ... "I think I might be gay ..."

  10. #90
    Jokeroo Legend brilor's Avatar
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    Default Re: Racist jokes

    A twin-engine plane has one of its engines fail, altitude and air speed are rapidly decreasing ...The pilot speaks over the intercom. "I'm sorry it had to come to this folks, but unfortunately we're gonna have to jettison baggage in order for the aircraft to remain airborne." Baggage is thrown out, but the plane's speed continues to decrease.
    >
    >
    > Again the pilot gets on the intercom, "I hate to have to do this, but now we're gonna have to start off-loading passengers. The only fair way to do it is alphabetically, so we'll start with the letter - A". "Africans, any Africans on board?"
    >
    > No one answers.
    >
    >
    > "Ok then - B".
    >
    >
    > "Black people, any black people?"
    >
    >
    > Again, silence.
    >
    >
    > "C" Colored people, any Colored people on board?"
    >
    >
    > Silence.
    >
    >
    > A little black boy in the back turns to his mother. "But Mom, ain't we African?, ain't we Black? Ain't we Colored?"
    >
    >
    > "Yes son, but for the purpose of this exercise we is Niggers. Let dem Mexicans and Muslims go first."

  11. #91
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    Default Re: Racist jokes

    Pamwa is a young boy from Pakistan. He is severely undernourished, and is a victim of civil war. He only has one leg, no arms and bad eyesight through one eye. He cycles seven miles every day on a bike with no handlebars, and flat tyres, just to collect water so he and his family can survive.

    For just 2 a month, we'll send you the DVD's, they're fucking hilarious!



  12. #92
    Administrator squirt's Avatar
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    Default Re: Racist jokes

    HOW IT ALL GOT STARTED

    The day it started was March 6,1836.

    On that fateful day Davy Crockett woke up and rose from his bunk on the main floor of the Alamo.

    He then walked up to the observation post along the west wall of the fort. William B. Travis and Jim Bowie were already there, looking out over the top of the wall.

    These three great men gazed at the hordes of Mexicans moving toward them.

    With a puzzled look on his face, Crockett turned to Bowie and said: "Jim, are we having some landscaping done today?"

  13. #93
    Administrator squirt's Avatar
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    Default Re: Racist jokes

    Two friends in Saskatoon, Saskatchewan, Canada were sick of winter, so they went to a travel agent and booked a trip to Australia.

    When the two friends got off the plane, still wearing their down jackets, wool hats, and snow boots, they wandered into a pub and sat down. The locals wondered about these strangers, so one of the Aussies walked over to the visitors and said, "G'day, mates. Where'er you from?"

    "Saskatoon, Saskatchewan," one of the Canadians replied.

    "So where are they from?" the other locals asked.

    "Don't know," replied the Aussie. "They don't speak English."

  14. #94
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    Default Re: Racist jokes

    An Englishman, a Scotsman, an Irishman, a Latvian, a Turk, an Aussie, a Yank, an Egyptian, a Jap, a Mexican, a Spaniard, a Greek, a Russian, an Estonian, a German, an Italian, a Pole, a Lithuanian, a Swede, a Finn, an Israeli, a Romanian, a Bulgarian, a Serb, a Czech, and a Swiss man walk into a pub.

    The landlord says, "I can't let you in without a Thai."



  15. #95
    Jokeroo Legend brilor's Avatar
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    Default Re: Racist jokes

    Mohammed entered his classroom on the first day of school.

    "What's your name?" asked the teacher.

    "Mohammed," he replied.

    "You're in America now," replied the teacher, "So from now on you will be
    known as Kevin."

    Mohammed returned home after school.

    "How was your day, Mohammed?" his mother asked.

    "My name is not Mohammed. I'm in America and now my name is Kevin."

    "Are you ashamed of your name? Are you trying to dishonor your parents,
    your heritage, your religion? Shame on you!" And his mother beat him.

    Then she called his father, who beat him again.

    The next day Mohammed returned to school. The teacher saw all of his
    bruises.

    "What happened to you, Kevin? she asked.

    Well ma'am, shortly after becoming an American, I was attacked by two
    fuckin' Arabs.

  16. #96
    Jokeroo Enthusiast konifur's Avatar
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    Default Re: Racist jokes

    I just saw a muslim with three lions on his shirt

    I fucking love Blair Drummond Safari Park.



  17. #97
    Jokeroo Enthusiast konifur's Avatar
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    Default Re: Racist jokes

    A robber walks into a bank and shouts, "Freeze - Give me all your cash!".
    A brave customer pulls off the robber's mask and says "I've seen your face now", so the robber shoots him. "Anyone else seen my face?"
    Silence for a moment, then someone pipes up, "I think that paki in the corner got a glimpse...!"



  18. #98
    Jokeroo Enthusiast konifur's Avatar
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    Default Re: Racist jokes

    Kids in Africa have it so much easier than in the UK,
    they probably don't even know what cyber-bullying is.



  19. #99
    Jokeroo Enthusiast konifur's Avatar
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    Default Re: Racist jokes

    A Muslim has been shot in the head with a starting pistol, police say it’s definitely race related....................



  20. #100
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    Default Re: Racist jokes

    i was in primark yesterday and saw a black man looking at some polyester shirts,i thought,"that`s strange they usually pick cotton."



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