Groaner thread (please add)

squirt

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brilor

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Just when you think you knew all the text abbreviation possible, then there's these:
(_!_) regular arse
(__!__) fat arse
(!) tight arse
(_*_) sore arse

(_o_) well used arse
(_e=mc2_) smart arse
And my favourite for those you want to really tell it to ...
(_x_) kiss my arse !
 

brilor

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I couldn't undo the buttons on my jumper, so I tried pulling it over my head but got it stuck.
I'm in A&E now waiting to see a cardyologist.