A man and a woman were having drinks at a business conference when they got into an argument about who enjoyed sex more. The man said, "Men obviously enjoy sex more than women. Why do you think we're so obsessed with getting laid?" " That doesn't prove anything," the woman countered. "Think about this: when your ear itches and you put your finger in it and wiggle it around, then pull it out, which feels better: your ear or your finger?
I walked into my local pub last night and said to one of my mates standing over by the bar, "Who's the woman sitting in the corner with duct tape across her mouth?"
"That's my new girlfriend." he replied.
"Really?" I said, "You've kept that one quiet."