Racist jokes

brilor

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brilor

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I can remember my first day at school. The teacher looked at me during register and asked, "Are you chewing?" I said, "No, Chew Wing is probably one of the Asian kids, my name is Brian.
 

brilor

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Once upon a time in Australia...

An Indian, a Maori, a Muslim and an Australian were walking along an Australian beach when the Maori stumbled over a bottle in the sand. He picked up the bottle, rubbed the sand off it, and ........ a Genie appeared !

"I can only grant four wishes !" the Genie said. "Since there are four of you, you may have one wish apiece !"

Pointing to the Maori, he said, "Since you found the bottle, you may have the first wish."

The Maori thought for a moment, then said, "I wish for a fleet of ships so that I can gather all my people and take them back to our homeland of Aotearoa."

Poof! It was done! Thousands of ships appeared on the skyline.

The Indian said, "I wish for enough aircraft to take all fellow Indians back to our homeland !"

Poof! It was done! Row after row of aircraft filled the sky.

The Muslim said, "I wish for a hundred thousand camels to take all of my people away from this horrible country infested with infidels so we can live in peace in Muslim countries and serve the Prophet Allah."

Poof! It was done! A hundred thousand camels suddenly appeared on the beach.

Turning to the Australian, the Genie asked, "And what is your wish ?"

The Aussie watched as the loaded aircraft began moving toward the runway, then looked out to sea and watched the loaded ships sailing out into the sunset, then he looked at all of the Muslims getting on top of the camels and riding off.

He said, "Look mate, just give me a cold beer. It really doesn't get any better than this !"
 

konifur

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I opened my door this morning & there was a big black coffin.
I gave him some Lockets and told him to fuck off.
 

konifur

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See a poster up at the local police station - black man wanted for rape.

I thought, fucking world's gone pc mad even the niggers are being offered the best jobs nowadays.
 

konifur

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A Pakistani entered our carriage on the train this morning. Straight away, people put bags on empty seats, women started spraying air freshener, someone started eating a bacon butty and at least one man told him he was a Paki bastard and to fuck off. I can't say I blamed him when he stormed out. Don't think he checked many tickets though.