Tail of the little cat (my first novel)

squirt

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#21
I can't imagine how I'd feel if my sisters had cut me out of my dad's last days, they were quite the opposite, even though they were up there with him and I was a hundred miles away, they made sure I knew what was going on
forgiveness is something we do for ourselves, it doesn't erase the memory, the memory stays to serve as a lesson[/COLOR]
 

Goodgrief

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#22
I flew across the country to be there when my dad passed away. Did the same thing when mom went. I wasn't told about my aunt soon enough. I had health problems at the time, I was only able to give her a proper funeral months after she died.

Forgiveness, ah yes. It's hard to forgive when you find out that the ghouls try to take away a person's assets while they are still sound of mind. People you trusted, family members. Bitter memories about that weasel. He's gone. Hadn't I gone back at the right time, since he had been given the Power of Attorney status, he would have stolen mom's house right under her feet while she was still in a recovering facility. Shedding tears about him? No way.

But yes, I still miss my parents. I always will. Sometimes, I wish I could just pick up the phone and call. I'm getting old too and so is my husband.

Forgiveness is hard to attain when trust is broken.
 

sexysadie

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#23
[QUOTE="Goodgrief, post: 4843747]I flew across the country to be there when my dad passed away. Did the same thing when mom went. I wasn't told about my aunt soon enough. I had health problems at the time, I was only able to give her a proper funeral months after she died.

Forgiveness, ah yes. It's hard to forgive when you find out that the ghouls try to take away a person's assets while they are still sound of mind. People you trusted, family members. Bitter memories about that weasel. He's gone. Hadn't I gone back at the right time, since he had been given the Power of Attorney status, he would have stolen mom's house right under her feet while she was still in a recovering facility. Shedding tears about him? No way.

But yes, I still miss my parents. I always will. Sometimes, I wish I could just pick up the phone and call. I'm getting old too and so is my husband.

Forgiveness is hard to attain when trust is broken.
[/QUOTE]


We're only human, of course forgiveness is hard, but we do it, not necessarily for the person who has wronged us or somebody we love, but for ourselves, so that we can move on and have no regrets, it's important. My father was a horrible little man, he made our lives as kids a living hell and although it took years, I forgave him and moved forward as did most of my siblings, one of my sisters, however, couldn't do it, still to this day it eats away at her, it's caused her to need medication for her nerves etc. Not forgiving him for what he did to her, and holding on to the anger hasn't hurt him one bit, he's fine, as a matter of fact, he doesn't even remember, or at least he says he doesn't, but it's hurt her terribly. My fathers getting up there in years and his health is failing fast, I've sat down and had individual conversations with my siblings about his funeral etc, and most are ok with going and paying their respects, but not her, she refuses to go. So, I've tried to compromise with her, for her sake, I've asked that when he's gone if we can get together at his apartment and they can help me make decisions about where and what to do with his belongings, ( for my sake )and I think I've got her convinced, we'll see. At least that way, there's a tiny chance that she'll look back on it one day as her way of letting go of the past and maybe she can move on with her life.
I'm sorry about your parents GG *hugs*
 

roadkill

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#24
[QUOTE="squirt, post: 4836383]I can't imagine how I'd feel if my sisters had cut me out of my dad's last days, they were quite the opposite, even though they were up there with him and I was a hundred miles away, they made sure I knew what was going on
forgiveness is something we do for ourselves, it doesn't erase the memory, the memory stays to serve as a lesson
[/QUOTE]
[video=youtube;uloaEY81hOQ]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uloaEY81hOQ[/video]
 

roadkill

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#25
You lived your life thinking that no one cared
You thought you were all alone, your heart feeling tattered
I am here to tell you that you were wrong
'Cause you see - Mom - to me you mattered

I loved you when you were angry and mean
I loved you when you were kind as could be
I loved you not just because I had to
I loved you because you mattered to me

It hurts to know that now you're gone
And never will your face again I see
I hurt not because I am supposed to
I hurt because you mattered to me

I have to live on each day without you
It doesn't get easier as it is supposed to be
I feel the loss of you to my very soul
Because you see - Mom - you mattered to me

Your touch, your smile, your funny wit
The times it was just you and me
I will miss you, Mom, with all my heart
'Cause you still matter to me..


 

squirt

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#26


I'd call up Deb, tell her how proud I am of her daughters, I'd tell her how beautiful her new grandson is, and how much I wish she could be there to see her baby girl graduate
and I'd tell her that I miss her and love her so very much, and then I'd tell her to hug Jesus ... and your mom ♥

wonderful song, Love ... thank you
 

roadkill

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#27
[QUOTE="squirt, post: 4844136]


I'd call up Deb, tell her how proud I am of her daughters, I'd tell her how beautiful her new grandson is, and how much I wish she could be there to see her baby girl graduate
and I'd tell her that I miss her and love her so very much, and then I'd tell her to hug Jesus ... and your mom ♥

wonderful song, Love ... thank you
[/QUOTE]
i believe as you know...that they watch over us and are never far away...they see from heaven and attend events in our lives as spirits..we dont always see them but we feel their presence and catch the signs that they are with us..i would call every sunday like i use to do while she was on earth..thank you my Texas star
 

Goodgrief

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#28
[QUOTE="sexysadie, post: 4843853]We're only human, of course forgiveness is hard, but we do it, not necessarily for the person who has wronged us or somebody we love, but for ourselves, so that we can move on and have no regrets, it's important. My father was a horrible little man, he made our lives as kids a living hell and although it took years, I forgave him and moved forward as did most of my siblings, one of my sisters, however, couldn't do it, still to this day it eats away at her, it's caused her to need medication for her nerves etc. Not forgiving him for what he did to her, and holding on to the anger hasn't hurt him one bit, he's fine, as a matter of fact, he doesn't even remember, or at least he says he doesn't, but it's hurt her terribly. My fathers getting up there in years and his health is failing fast, I've sat down and had individual conversations with my siblings about his funeral etc, and most are ok with going and paying their respects, but not her, she refuses to go. So, I've tried to compromise with her, for her sake, I've asked that when he's gone if we can get together at his apartment and they can help me make decisions about where and what to do with his belongings, ( for my sake )and I think I've got her convinced, we'll see. At least that way, there's a tiny chance that she'll look back on it one day as her way of letting go of the past and maybe she can move on with her life.
I'm sorry about your parents GG *hugs*
[/QUOTE]


I hope your sister eventually gets over her anger. I was angry at my father for some of the things he did. But nobody is perfect. Instead of focusing on the bad, I remembered the good times we had when I was a child. A mechanic's daughter. That's what I became. He taught me how to use tools and be practical. He was a hard ass, so am I! Things changed when I became a teenager. I wanted my freedom, he wanted to keep me sequestered. God knows how many of my boyfriends he scared away!
What he didn't expect was the last one.

I try very much to be fair. I'll give credit where it is earned. My dad did things I will never forgive, but I will never forget the good side of him.



 

sexysadie

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#29
[QUOTE="Goodgrief, post: 4844180]I hope your sister eventually gets over her anger. I was angry at my father for some of the things he did. But nobody is perfect. Instead of focusing on the bad, I remembered the good times we had when I was a child. A mechanic's daughter. That's what I became. He taught me how to use tools and be practical. He was a hard ass, so am I! Things changed when I became a teenager. I wanted my freedom, he wanted to keep me sequestered. God knows how many of my boyfriends he scared away!
What he didn't expect was the last one.

I try very much to be fair. I'll give credit where it is earned. My dad did things I will never forgive, but I will never forget the good side of him.



[/QUOTE]

awww GG, it's great that you have a good side to remember about your father, my sister I'm afraid does not, in order to forgive him she's got to try and understand him, and realize that she was just a child, innocent and blameless. Who knows why people do the things that they do, whether it be sickness or just blatant disregard for another human being, it happens all the time and we can choose to put a band-aid on it and let it fester and take over our lives or we can seek help and allow it to heal. Your father sounds like a great man btw, and I can just see you now, with your little toolbelt on, trying to help lol you must've been so cute. I see my sister a few times a week. ATM she's caring for her husband who took a stroke a few years ago and has never fully recovered. I take her to do her shopping/errands whatever she needs done and that's the extent of her social life. She sometimes complains about being stuck indoors a lot but I think in a way she prefers it that way. She's a few years older than I am, she's 53, turning 54 in october, but to listen to her, she's ancient, at the end of her lifespan, ready to curl up and die, it's pitiful and sad. I've tried just listening, I've tried relating to her and I've tried tough love, but nothing seems to snap her out of it. I even joked once about getting her revenge on him by living well, but to no avail. I haven't given up, I'll never do that, she's my sister, one day I'll get through to her, maybe it'll be after he's gone, who knows, I guess we'll just have to wait and see.
 

Goodgrief

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#30
It's a sad story, SS. I've never had siblings. I don't know what it's like to have a sister or brother. Seems to me like your sister could have used some professional help. One cannot go on for so long with so much anger. It destroys you. I had a one-on-one confrontation with my dad a few years before he passed. I kept cool and calm. He's the one who left the room crying.
He finally knew what he had done wrong. He tried to control me. That never sat too well.




 

sexysadie

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#31
[QUOTE="Goodgrief, post: 4844247]It's a sad story, SS. I've never had siblings. I don't know what it's like to have a sister or brother. Seems to me like your sister could have used some professional help. One cannot go on for so long with so much anger. It destroys you. I had a one-on-one confrontation with my dad a few years before he passed. I kept cool and calm. He's the one who left the room crying.
He finally knew what he had done wrong. He tried to control me. That never sat too well.




[/QUOTE]

I agree with you 100% my friend, control and abuse go hand in hand, it's a fact. I'm glad you had that one on one, I think that closure, no matter how it turns out for the other person, is important for all of us, that's what I've been trying to tell my sister, don't do it for him, do it for you, and move on.