The Mathematics of Life

stevent222

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In school, we learn a lot of useless math. However, in the school of life, there are some formulas that may hold true! So here are some interesting mathematical formulas from the school of life!


ROMANCE MATHE MATICS


Smart man + Smart woman = Romance

Smart man + Dumb woman = Affair

Dumb man + Smart woman = Marriage

Dumb man + Dumb woman = Pregnancy


OFFICE ARITHEMETIC


Smart boss + Smart employee = Profit


Smart boss + Dumb employee = Production

Dumb boss + Smart employee = Promotion

Dumb boss + Dumb employee = Overtime


SHOPPING MATH

A man will pay $2 for a $1 item he needs.

A woman will pay $1 for a $2 item that she doesn't need.


HAPPINESS

To be happy with a man,

You must understand him a lot and love him a little.
To be happy with a woman,

You must love her a lot and not try to understand her at all.




LONGEVITY

Married men live longer than single men,
But married men are a lot more willing to die.




PROPENSITY TO CHANGE


A woman marries a man expecting he will change,
But he doesn't.
A man marries a woman expecting that she won't change,
But she does.


GENERAL EQUATIONS & STATISTICS

A woman worries about the future until she gets a husband.
(Then she worries about the husband...)
A man never worries about the future until he gets a wife.
A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend.
A successful woman is one who finds such a man.


DISCUSSION TECHNIQUE


A woman has the last word in any argument.
Anything a man says after that is the beginning of a new argument.