the mother-in-law (feel free to add! ♥)

squirt

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#1
A big game hunter went on safari with his wife and mother-in-law. One evening, while still deep in the jungle, the Mrs. awoke to find her mother gone. Rushing to her husband, she insisted on them both trying to find her mother.

The hunter picked up his rifle, took a swig of whiskey, and started to look for her. In a clearing not far from the camp, they came upon a chilling sight: the mother-in-law was backed up against a thick, impenetrable bush, her clothes torn off, and a large male gorilla stood facing her, with an obvious erection.

The wife cried, "What are we going to do?"

"Nothing," said the hunter husband. "The gorilla got himself into this mess, let him get himself out of it."
 

stevent222

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#3
After being married for ten years to my second wife, I offered her and her mother a ships cruse. I know I am just that type of nice guy. Even told her that hey they even made a move where the ship is going.



"The Perfect Storm"
 

Tokentoo

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#4
LOL... here is one right from the Roo Pages

At some point in a conversation...Bigfoot was brought up

Roo'er #1: Did you see any??

Roo'er #2: I got one for a Mother in law Thanks

Roo'er #3: Good trade...LOL

:funny:
 

squirt

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#12
A man is driving with his wife at his side and his mother-in-law in the back seat. And the women just won't leave the poor guy alone.

His mother-in-law says, "You're driving too fast!"

His wife says, "Stay to the left!"

After several more orders from both of them, the man breaks down and barks at his wife, "Who's driving this car; you or your mother?"
 

Crudebug

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#13
A mother with 3 daughters decided it was time to put her son-in-laws to the test.
She invited her first son-in-law for a walk in the park, fell into the lake and pretended to be drowning. Without hesitation the son-in-law jumped into the water and saved her. The next morning there was a brand new Peugeot in the driveway with the message: Thank You – Your mother-in-law
A couple of days later she `did’ the same thing to her second son-in-law. He too saved her and the next morning found a shiny Peugeot in his driveway with the same message.
The next week, it was the turn of the third son-in-law. He did not lift a finger to help her and let the bitch drown. The next day he found a spanking new Porsche convertible in his driveway.. with the message:
.
.
Thank You – Your Father-in-law
 

Huggies

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#14
Standing at the edge of the lake, a man saw a woman flailing about in the deep water. Unable to swim, the man screamed for help. A trout fisherman ran up. The man said, "My wife is drowning and I can't swim. Please save her. I'll give you a hundred dollars." The fisherman dove into the water. In ten powerful strokes he reached the woman, put his arm around her, and swam back to shore. Depositing her at the feet of the man, the fisherman said, "Okay, where's my hundred dollars?" The man said, "Look, when I saw her going down for the third time, I thought it was my wife. But this is my MIL." The fisherman reached into his pocket and said, "Just my luck. How much do I owe you?"
 

Huggies

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#15

A guy brings his dog into the vet and says, "Could you please cut my dog's tail off?" The vet examines the tail and says, "There is nothing wrong. Why would you want this done?" The man replies, "My MIL is coming to visit, and I don't want anything in the house to make her think that she is welcome!"

 

Huggies

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#16
A man returned home from the night shift and went straight up to the bedroom. He found his wife with the sheet pulled over her head, fast asleep. Not to be denied, the horny husband crawled under the sheet and proceeded to make love to her. Afterward, as he hurried downstairs for something to eat, he was startled to find breakfast on the table and his wife pouring coffee. "How'd you get down here so fast?" he asked. "We were just making love!" "Oh my God," his wife gasped, "That's my mother up there! She came over early and had complained of having a headache. I told her to lie down for a while." Rushing upstairs, the wife ran to the bedroom. "Mother, I can't believe this happened. Why didn't you say something?" The mother-in-law huffed, "I haven't spoken to that jerk for fifteen years, and I wasn't about to start now!"

 

squirt

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#17
Standing at the edge of the lake, a man saw a woman flailing about in the deep water. Unable to swim, the man screamed for help. A trout fisherman ran up. The man said, "My wife is drowning and I can't swim. Please save her. I'll give you a hundred dollars." The fisherman dove into the water. In ten powerful strokes he reached the woman, put his arm around her, and swam back to shore. Depositing her at the feet of the man, the fisherman said, "Okay, where's my hundred dollars?" The man said, "Look, when I saw her going down for the third time, I thought it was my wife. But this is my MIL." The fisherman reached into his pocket and said, "Just my luck. How much do I owe you?"
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lmao ... damn the luck!!! lol :screams:
:bravo: :blowhearts: