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He really needs to work on his tells.

Is wonder what it looks like on the inside.

A farmer's job is to produce produce. The politically correct term for someone with any limitations is disabled. Therefore, saying someone is invalid is invalid. A farmer is a sower, but a tailor is a sewer and neither one works in a sewer.

Oh look! It's a party line!

Actually, 2050 is closer, we'll never see 1990 again.

The last snowfall we had here, I was shoveling my drive. I was just finishing when the plow came through, the driver went to the end of the road and turned around to plow the other side of the street. When he came past my drive, he crossed the street and cleared the snow he had plowed into my...

She's thinking positively!

Hitchcock, at first, I couldn't think of his name and the suspense was killing me.

1 open up, 2 You're under arrest 3 Double cross 4 I understand 5 hole in one 6 holy cow 7 All mixed up 8 tricycle 9 Good afternoon 10 big mac 11 High chair 12 Touch down How did I do?

You never know when your laxative will kick in.

F...found O...on R...road D...dead

As I remember it, Ford Motor Co. had a contract with Firestone tire. There was some issue with the tires blowing out and causing rollover crashes with the Bronco. Ford blamed Firestone claiming they were making inferior tires, Firestone claimed Ford was using too small tires for the weight of...

"Ride the roller coaster they said, it'll be fun they said. Oh, whee."

My grandma would take me there sometimes. they had balloons you could buy and pop with a tag inside them. When you popped the balloon, you got whatever treat the tag had written on it. I got my first "store bought" banana split that way.

No. No. NO!

His designated driver?

When the prison I worked at first opened, there was a yellow lab that hung around all the time (he grew up on the farm the owners took him when they moved, but he kept coming back). He lived to chase anything that anybody was willing to throw. In the wintertime, we would make snowballs and...

Well trained.

Dropped the wedding ring, gotta get it back.

I don't know about that, it never worked for me.