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  1. Geoff_the_Beard

    I, also, need leg surgery

    Having mentioned it in Steven's thread, I guess I should give more detail. A little over three years ago I started experiencing severe pain in my right leg. My GP looked at it, and couldn't find a pulse in it, so she referred me to Southampton General Hospital. They did a number of tests...
  2. Geoff_the_Beard

    Is Windows 10 worth an upgrade?

    I am still mostly using my now quite old XP machine most of the time, because it still works fine and does almost anything I want to do. I did some months back get a Windows 7 machine with 8 GB RAM and a 1 TB hard disk, to which I added a 3 TB secondary hard disk, which has all my data. I don't...
  3. Geoff_the_Beard

    Creating a Tube - a Tutorial

    Creating a Tube – a Tutorial I use PSP9. Other versions will show slightly different screens, but the features I use are available in all versions. For most of this it is worthwhile working at fullscreen to make positioning of the cursor easier. The pictures shown here are only at a smaller...
  4. Geoff_the_Beard

    Help please with Curved Text

    Perhaps foolishly, I volunteered to make the new logo for our support group for recovering alcoholics. We had a competition, and two sketched designs were chosen. I have done most of the first design: but haven't manage to put the name "Active Recovery" into the scrolls that are to go...
  5. Geoff_the_Beard

    I don't understand!

    I just read an ad that said "Wanted: Portable baby changing mat". I always thought all babies were portable! I called and asked what I was required to turn the portable baby into? It seems that I am now on the Naughty step, but I don't have any crayons to play with! :hairpull:
  6. Geoff_the_Beard

    Olympic Worries

    The organisers for the 2012 Olympics have today published a long list of things that will not be allowed to be taken into the Games, which includes all types of food, except babyfood. Will I be ok, if I purée my burgers and pizzas?
  7. Geoff_the_Beard

    Why our great grandparents were so much happier...

    WHY OUR GREAT GRANDPARENTS WERE SO MUCH HAPPIER Have you ever wondered why our great grandparents all had such fond memories of their youth? Well... I'm surprised they remembered anything at all!!! Forget Tums & Tylenol. Forget Aleeve & Benedryl. Look at the cool stuff they...
  8. Geoff_the_Beard

    Excerpts from the Edinburgh Fringe 2005

    Excerpts from the Edinburgh Fringe 2005 I realised I was dyslexic when I went to a toga party dressed as a goat. My dad is Irish and my mum is Iranian, which meant that we spent most of our family holidays in Customs. My parents are from Glasgow which means they're incredibly hard, but...
  9. Geoff_the_Beard

    Pass WithCare

  10. Geoff_the_Beard

    Salvation Army Sign

  11. Geoff_the_Beard

    Creative Lion

  12. Geoff_the_Beard


  13. Geoff_the_Beard

    Deep Sea Diver

    NEVER COMPLAIN ABOUT MONDAYS AGAIN ***** Long but worth it ***** Next time you have a bad day at work, think of this guy. Bob is a commercial saturation diver for Global Divers in Louisiana. He performs underwater repairs on offshore drilling rigs. Below is an E-mail he sent to his sister...
  14. Geoff_the_Beard

    Lady Farmers

    The blonde and brunette sisters Two sisters, one blonde and one brunette, inherit the family ranch. Unfortunately, after just a few years, they are in financial trouble. In order to keep the bank from repossessing the ranch, they need to purchase a bull so that they can breed their own stock...
  15. Geoff_the_Beard

    Shark Dinners

  16. Geoff_the_Beard

    Rent a Car

    I don't think they will get much business!
  17. Geoff_the_Beard

    Not Firefighting

  18. Geoff_the_Beard

    The Complaints Department

  19. Geoff_the_Beard

    Technology for Country Folk

  20. Geoff_the_Beard

    Working Together